let’s just say i almost blasted my one-off opportunity to read architecture - i screwed up the aptitude test and missed the interview. just… like that. imagine how fucked up i can get. i have never, ever in my life felt so depressed until today when i finally felt the inferiority and the shitty feeling of coming unprepared and lack of confidence.
i arrived at the exam venue early and waited outside the seminar room until the doors could open for the examinees to proceed in. i sat down on a bench, tryin’ very hard to recall & ‘internalise’ what i’ve read (only 2 pages of a book; i borrowed 4 books -_-) and every now and then, looked around to check on the other examinees and at the same time, see if we could be allowed to go in. then it just struck me to take out the letter which confirmed my shortlisting and i realised something had not gone right. from what i gathered, my test was at 11.30 am on sunday, 30th apr and interview at 9.35 am on 2nd may.
the letter wrote this:
interviews for local candidates will be held on tuesday, 2 may 06 from 9 am onwards. local candidates who have been shortlisted for the interviews will have their names and interview timings posted on this website on sunday, 30 apr 06 from 11.59 pm onwards. some candidates would be required to attent the interview on sunday 30 apr 06 in two sessions: 9.30 am and at 2.30 pm. these candidates would be notified separately via email on 25 apr 06.
guess what? i panicked. something was not right.. i thought all along my interview’s scheduled on the 2nd but i could have misinterpreted. then i recalled back the past few days i checked my mail everyday but still no email from nus - that could have
meant that my interview shouldn’t be on sunday and should still be on tuesday. but i was still worried..
outside the room still waiting, i called home to ask brother to get my application letter and guess what.. the email add i submitted to nus was of another account!! NO WONDER I DIDN’T GET ANY MAIL. fuck!! and of all times, the webmail server has to come down!.. just my luck.. i couldn’t even be sure if i might have missed my interview or if i was right in assuming my interview’s scheduled on the 2nd.. damn it. and THAT thought has to come only at this time a few mins before the test.. fuck.. so never mind, interview aside, already saddened but still forced myself to get back to where i was - take the test!
aptitude test.
ok, so i went in, received the paper, and read the questions..
THERE..right at that moment..i felt so uneasy. i felt like giving up. i couldn’t do questions like these for nuts sake! the questions
weren’t tough but still i couldn’t manage them. i understood every word but.. sigh.. it was a torturous 2 hrs. i looked up, looked left (my right was a wall :s), looked down back onto my paper, stared hard at the questions, mind blank, held my pencil, making air scribbles but nothing came out.. that moment has got to suck seriously.
qn 1 was designed to test my abilities to be creative and build a model. it went like.. ok, blahblah, crap about thinking out of the box, and re-thinking again to challenge creativity blahblah, then design a 3-dimensional model, making use of the white, orange and black A4 construction sheets given, that best explores the two ideas of “rhythm” and “contrast”. WTF u say? i say WTF too.. but ultimately, i tried to construct something that looks like a blossoming flower, with black and white petals of different heights (hopefully it illustrated rhythm) and a huge orange petal in the middle, glued to the other petals (this probably i hope, demonstrated contrast). i found my work pretty ok.
qn 2 is about asking you to draw a city/building, space or a furniture that best illustrates “creative living”. this is easy but sadly i couldn’t manage it. i had a perfect concept in my mind (waterfront bay or an ideal bedroom with murals, a inbuilt wall aquarium and a ceiling that parts open to receive moonlight) but I CAN’T FUCKING DRAW!! what did i draw in the end? a fucking retarded gaylooking, overbearingly colourful, grotesquely shaped sofa set. -_______-. and the worse thing is.. this has nothing to do with architecture, it’s towards interior designing or industrial designing. I WOULD HAVE DRAWN BUILDINGS IF I HAD THE GIFT OF DRAWING!! in other words, i applied architecture only to draw a stupid sofa in the test.. -_-
qn 3 wanted me to write in no less than 50 words describing how my (imperfect) design has associated with “creative living”. i couldn’t remembered a word i wrote - it was a paragraph of crap and rubbish.
and then 2 hours went, and we had to carry out models down to the first floor for submission. as terrible as i have felt (because of the interview which i most probably by then thinking i have missed it and i screwed the test up), it’s still funny seeing all of us bringing models down to the first floor. all of us were strangers and what raced through most of our minds (at least mine..) was “eeww…what the fuck is that? is that torchlight or sth?”. i saw one who named her work “playground” but the model didn’t look at all like one.. it looked more like a.. junk carrier or sth. LOL. ok i’m evil.. ARGH!! who cares?!
interview.
thank gawd they gave me a second chance. at least my lie of “Oh, i had camp commitments the past few weeks and could only come back this morning, thus missing the interview”, worked! hopefully they don’t read this. lol. so anyway, the interview process was a breeze, they were nice, but at points sarcastic. and they were shocked i got a C for english o levels. they said i could speak well and carry myself presentably, but might not have performed well in writing. they wrote down some comments on their interview sheet and looked at my portfolio. and i left after 5 mins.
i was extremely grateful for a second chance. really. i don’t care how much the admin officer might have hated me for bothering her with numerous calls to request for 2nd chance or rescheduling, and how she would have blacklisted me as a result or marked me to the professors, as long as i’m in the room, am given a few minutes to sell myself, i’m happy. it doesn’t matter (at that point) if i get thru’ the test /interview.
i know i didn’t write well in this entry. i couldn’t be bothered. i am already upset enough that my day hasn’t been nice.. and if the architecture department didn’t want me in, it doesn’t matter, i’ve tried and done my best. besides, i have so many worries and concerns if i ever get into architecture.. at least i know now if they didn’t want to accept me cos i’m not qualified enough or can’t even be bothered about taking the test and interview seriously, i wouldn’t feel that as bad.. 
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well it's over already, so no use brooding over it. i guess you can count on them in determining whether you're cut out for architecture or not, so either way you're not losing anything.
Posted by stan- at May 1, 2006, 5:12 pm